There is an old Chinese curse that states “may you live in interesting times” I didn’t fully comprehend it’s meaning until recently, but faced with uncertainty and change, not just as individuals but nationally and globally, its sardonic message is clear.
We like to think we crave adventure, excitement, and variety, whereas the evidence suggests that what we really want is familiarity, predictability, and safety. We stay in the same job, live in the same town, continue with the same relationships, repeat the same mistakes, and even return to the same holiday spots year after year, telling ourselves “better the devil you know.” Forest Gump compared life to a box of chocolates “you never know what you are going to get” – and don’t we just hate that, because what if we chose the wrong one!
We can blame our biology for being risk adverse creatures of habit. In a complex environment full of potential pitfalls, our brains will always look for the simplest and safest option, even if that means missing out on new opportunities and chances for growth.
But just because evolution hard wired us to seek out safety, it doesn’t mean she didn’t equip us with the resources to handle difficult situations and to rise to whatever challenges life throws as us. After all, we are the product of millions of years of natural selection and evolution. Only by being the fittest and most adaptable did we survive.
Today we are more likely to do battle with rush hour traffic than a Sabretooth Tiger, and compared to our cave dwelling ancestors, our lives are relatively safe. And yet many of us continue to live in a state of high alert, our brains interpreting the stress of modern life as danger, signalling the ‘fight or flight’ response that pumps adrenaline and cortisol through our bodies, priming us to confront enemies that may only exist our mind.
Is it any wonder that the recent Pandemic sent a shock wave that has shaken us to the core?
But something amazing has happened too. Have you noticed, how quickly we, as a nation have adapted to the situation? In the past 2 years we have undergone challenges and losses that we could not have even imagined. Incredibly, we have not just survived, but we have grown stronger and more resilient in the process. Acts of kindness, heroism and selflessness have become common place. Communities have come together, the strong are protecting the weak, and we are reassessing what is important to us. With a real enemy to fight we have found our focus.
Eleanor Roosevelt said, “women are like tea bags; you never know how strong they are until you put them in hot water.” But it’s not only women who have that strength. As a species we have survived, adapted, and thrived in the most hostile of environments and we are continuing to do that today.
Of course, we haven’t all been able to cope as easily to these challenges as we may have liked. If you were struggling emotionally or psychologically before the pandemic, chances are you are finding it even tougher now.
Finding strength and resilience in the face of adversity requires us to be able to manage our anxieties, think clearly and positively and focus on what we can control. For some of us, the stress and uncertainty have triggered those primal survival instincts that have made us stronger. For others, it has been the straw that broke the camel’s back. If you suffer from depression, anxiety, OCD or panic disorders, or have become reliant on drugs or alcohol to get you through the day, you may not have the spare emotional capacity available to tap into the resources you need. Using a combination of hypnotherapy, CBT and mindfulness therapies, I’ve been helping clients gain control of their thoughts and emotions so that they can access their natural ability to survive, adapt and thrive through difficult times and even come back stronger.
If you would like to find out how hypnotherapy can help you, please contact me at 01278 760003 or email me at lynn@lynnwardhypnotherapy.co.uk to arrange a free 30 minute consultation.